CM&C Redux

Hey, that didn’t take long at all.

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Gaffa is the force that holds the universe together
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Special Effects

What I’ve learned from watching 100 movies and making 100+ cocktails is: 1) There are a lot of bad cocktail recipes out there.  2) New movies suck. 3) The WordPress spell checker doesn’t think that “movie” is a word.

But I swore to never use the word “film”.  Just to annoy people.

Oops.

My selection turned out to be a bit Now That’s What I Call Quite Early 90s Film Club, which is kinda natural, since that’s where I left off.  I tried getting a bit more current by buying dvds3a few handfuls of movies that had won Sundance awards during recent years, but most of them turned out to be lower-ish budget Hollywood-like schmaltz like Beasts of the Southern Wild.  They look kinda indie and interesting, but are excruciatingly boring to watch.

I mean, I do have patience with “boring” stuff as long as it’s good.  (For instance India Song or  Blue.) But when my bullshit detector goes off, I get cranky.

And I have little in the current crop of European art movies, like Antichrist or Irreversible.  And I loathe Haneke.  Basically crappy and dehumanising movies that have delusions of relevancy.  While probably functioning like the R&D division for commercial movies.

Anyway.

I’ve tried scoring the movies based on whether they’re good or not, and not whether I like them.  I do have great taste, though, so these are correlated, of course.  I sometimes like bad movies a lot, and (somewhat less often) I hate some good movies.

Here’s the complete list.  1 star means “awful”, 2 “bad”, 3 “not good, but watcheable”, 4 “not bad, but misseable”, 5 “good”, 6 “fantastic”.

★★★★☆☆1978JubileeDerek Jarman
★★★★★☆1972SolarisAndrei Tarkovsky
★★★★☆☆1981The Pee-Wee Herman ShowMarty Callner
★★☆☆☆☆2009District 9Neill Blomkamp
★★★★★☆1947Black NarcissusMichael Powell, Emeric Pressburger
★☆☆☆☆☆2005Batman BeginsChristopher Nolan
★★★★★☆1938Bringing Up BabyHoward Hawks
★★★★★★1964Bande à partJean-Luc Godard
★★★☆☆☆2008The Dark KnightChristopher Nolan
★★★★★★1996Nénette et BoniClaire Denis
★★☆☆☆☆2012Beasts of the Southern WildBenh Zeitlin
★★☆☆☆☆2005Red EyeWes Craven
★★★★☆☆2005Me and You and Everyone We KnowMiranda July
★★★★★★1963Federico Fellini
★★★★☆☆2004PalindromesTodd Solondz
★★★☆☆☆2010Tron: LegacyJoseph Kosinski
★★★☆☆☆1968Rachel, RachelPaul Newman
★★☆☆☆☆2008Be Kind RewindMichel Gondry
★★★★★☆2009ΚυνόδονταςYorgos Lanthimos
★★☆☆☆☆2011Like CrazyDrake Doremus
★★★★★☆1959Hiroshima, mon amourAlain Resnais
★★★★★☆2004Mean GirlsMark Waters
★★★★★★2012The Hobbit: An Unexpected JourneyPeter Jackson
★★☆☆☆☆1980Rude BoyJack Hazan, David Mingay
★★★★★☆2009The Limits of ControlJim Jarmusch
★★★★★★1975India SongMarguerite Duras
★★★☆☆☆2010L A ZombieBruce LaBruce
★★★☆☆☆2013ElysiumNeill Blomkamp
★★★★★☆2013I’m So ExcitedPedro Almodovar
★★☆☆☆☆2007SuperbadGreg Mottola
★★★★★☆1993BlueDerek Jarman
★★★★☆☆2009Transformers: Revenge of the FallenMichael Bay
★★★☆☆☆1930Menschen am SonntagKurt Siodmak, Robert Siodmak, Edgar G Ulmer, Fred Zinnemann & Rochus Gliese
★★★☆☆☆1996Bottle RocketWes Anderson
★★★★★☆1937Shall We DanceMark Sandrich
★★★★★☆2000In The Mood For LoveKar Wai Wong
★★★★★☆1988ChocolatClaire Denis
★★★★★☆2010Winter’s BoneDebra Granik
★★★★☆☆1963Shock CorridorSamuel Fuller
★★★★★☆1945Brief EncounterDavid Lean
★★★☆☆☆2011Scream 4Wes Craven
★★★★★★1979WoyzeckWerner Herzog
★☆☆☆☆☆2013Pacific RimGuillermo del Toro
★★★★★★2007Paranoid ParkGus van Sant
★★★★★★1983L’ArgentRobert Bresson
★★★★☆☆2007Eastern PromisesDavid Cronenberg
★★★☆☆☆2005New York DollGreg Whiteley
★★★☆☆☆1985SubwayLuc Besson
★★★★★☆1980Berlin AlexanderplatzRainer Werner Fassbinder
★★★☆☆☆2002SolarisSteven Soderbergh
★★★★☆☆2002The Rules of AttractionRoger Avary
★★★☆☆☆1971Two-Lane BlacktopMonte Hellman
★★☆☆☆☆1934Of Human BondageJohn Cromwell
★★★★☆☆2013The Hobbit: The Desolation of SmaugPeter Jackson
★★★★★★1965Pierrot le fouJean-Luc Godard
★★★☆☆☆2002Resident EvilPaul W S Anderson
★★★★☆☆2005The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the GalaxyGarth Jennings
★★★★★☆1953Tokyo StoryYasujirô Ozu
★★★☆☆☆20042046Kar Wai Wong
★★★☆☆☆1999JawbreakerDarren Stein
★★★★★★2006Inland EmpireDavid Lynch
★★★★★☆1990Cry-BabyJohn Waters
★☆☆☆☆☆1970HusbandsJohn Cassavetes
★★★★★☆2012Hunger GamesGary Ross
★★★★★☆2010Sound of NoiseOla Simonsson, Johannes Stjärne Nilsson
★★★☆☆☆1993Three Colours: BlueKrzysztof Kieslowski
★★★★☆☆1930Animal CrackersVictor Heerman
★★★★★☆2004Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless MindMichel Gondry
★★☆☆☆☆2008The Day The Earth Stood StillScott Derrickson
★★★★☆☆2011Midnight in ParisWoody Allen
★★★★★☆1981Death in VeniceTony Palmer
★★★★☆☆1943Destination TokyoDelmer Daves
★★★★★☆1987Out of RosenheimPercy Adlon
★★★☆☆☆1977The Serpent’s EggIngmar Bergman
★★★☆☆☆1995The Flower of My SecretPedro Almodóvar
★★★★☆☆1992Simple MenHal Hartley
★★★★☆☆1988HeathersMichael Lehmann
★★★★★☆2013G B FDarren Stein
★★★★☆☆1994Prêt-à-PorterRobert Altman
★★★★☆☆2013GravityAlfonso Cuarón
★★★★★☆1935Top HatMark Sandrich
★★★★★☆2009White MaterialClaire Denis
★★☆☆☆☆2012Promised LandGus Van Sant
★★★★☆☆2008AdorationAtom Egoyan
★★★☆☆☆2010You AgainAndy Fickman
★★★★★☆1960BreathlessJean-Luc Godard
★★★☆☆☆2013The Hunger Games: Catching FireFrancis Lawrence
★★★★☆☆2011LimelightBilly Corben
★★★★★★1948Bicycle ThievesVittorio De Sica
★★★★☆☆1973Day For NightFrançois Truffaut
★★★★★☆1942To Be Or Not To BeErnst Lubitsch
★★☆☆☆☆2013CBGBRandall Miller
★★★☆☆☆1936Theodora Goes WildRichard Boleslawski
★★★★☆☆1939The Rules of the GameJean Renoir
★★★☆☆☆2009Inglorious BasterdsQuentin Tarantino
★★★☆☆☆2005A History of ViolenceDavid Cronenberg
★★★☆☆☆2010Blue ValentineDerek Cianfrance
★★★★☆☆2006Small Town Gay BarMalcolm Ingram
★★★★☆☆1940Foreign CorrespondentAlfred Hitchcock
★★★★☆☆1948The Red ShoesMichael Powell, Emeric Pressburger

I started CM&C partially because I had too many unseen DVDs on the shelves. After finishing it, I have more unseen movies than I started with.

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And I have way more booze in the cupboard than anybody should have.

I peeked at imdb scores for the films I was watching, and it seems like virtually all movies get a rating between 6.5 and 7.5.  The only exceptions are truly awful ones, that get 5.7-6.3, and totally horrible fan service ones that get a rating of 8.0-8.5.  Any newer movie with a rating over 7.5 is almost certainly execrable.

Hm…  perhaps I should do a correlation matrix between my ratings and imdb ratings…  but that seems like work.

And now I never have to watch another movie again in my life! Whoho! I have my life back!

5 thoughts on “CM&C Redux”

  1. The best dessert cocktail was Bailey’s Banana Split. But anything with mint in it is good, so I’ll say Mint Juleps .Hm. Or perhaps the Seatlle Manhattan. Er…

      1. =D

        oh, you should calculate the correlation between coctail ratings and movie ratings to see if bad movies influenced your opinion of the drink

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