CM&C Redux

Hey, that didn’t take long at all.

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Gaffa is the force that holds the universe together
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Special Effects

What I’ve learned from watching 100 movies and making 100+ cocktails is: 1) There are a lot of bad cocktail recipes out there.  2) New movies suck. 3) The WordPress spell checker doesn’t think that “movie” is a word.

But I swore to never use the word “film”.  Just to annoy people.

Oops.

My selection turned out to be a bit Now That’s What I Call Quite Early 90s Film Club, which is kinda natural, since that’s where I left off.  I tried getting a bit more current by buying dvds3a few handfuls of movies that had won Sundance awards during recent years, but most of them turned out to be lower-ish budget Hollywood-like schmaltz like Beasts of the Southern Wild.  They look kinda indie and interesting, but are excruciatingly boring to watch.

I mean, I do have patience with “boring” stuff as long as it’s good.  (For instance India Song or  Blue.) But when my bullshit detector goes off, I get cranky.

And I have little in the current crop of European art movies, like Antichrist or Irreversible.  And I loathe Haneke.  Basically crappy and dehumanising movies that have delusions of relevancy.  While probably functioning like the R&D division for commercial movies.

Anyway.

I’ve tried scoring the movies based on whether they’re good or not, and not whether I like them.  I do have great taste, though, so these are correlated, of course.  I sometimes like bad movies a lot, and (somewhat less often) I hate some good movies.

Here’s the complete list.  1 star means “awful”, 2 “bad”, 3 “not good, but watcheable”, 4 “not bad, but misseable”, 5 “good”, 6 “fantastic”.

★★★★☆☆ 1978 Jubilee Derek Jarman
★★★★★☆ 1972 Solaris Andrei Tarkovsky
★★★★☆☆ 1981 The Pee-Wee Herman Show Marty Callner
★★☆☆☆☆ 2009 District 9 Neill Blomkamp
★★★★★☆ 1947 Black Narcissus Michael Powell, Emeric Pressburger
★☆☆☆☆☆ 2005 Batman Begins Christopher Nolan
★★★★★☆ 1938 Bringing Up Baby Howard Hawks
★★★★★★ 1964 Bande à part Jean-Luc Godard
★★★☆☆☆ 2008 The Dark Knight Christopher Nolan
★★★★★★ 1996 Nénette et Boni Claire Denis
★★☆☆☆☆ 2012 Beasts of the Southern Wild Benh Zeitlin
★★☆☆☆☆ 2005 Red Eye Wes Craven
★★★★☆☆ 2005 Me and You and Everyone We Know Miranda July
★★★★★★ 1963 Federico Fellini
★★★★☆☆ 2004 Palindromes Todd Solondz
★★★☆☆☆ 2010 Tron: Legacy Joseph Kosinski
★★★☆☆☆ 1968 Rachel, Rachel Paul Newman
★★☆☆☆☆ 2008 Be Kind Rewind Michel Gondry
★★★★★☆ 2009 Κυνόδοντας Yorgos Lanthimos
★★☆☆☆☆ 2011 Like Crazy Drake Doremus
★★★★★☆ 1959 Hiroshima, mon amour Alain Resnais
★★★★★☆ 2004 Mean Girls Mark Waters
★★★★★★ 2012 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Peter Jackson
★★☆☆☆☆ 1980 Rude Boy Jack Hazan, David Mingay
★★★★★☆ 2009 The Limits of Control Jim Jarmusch
★★★★★★ 1975 India Song Marguerite Duras
★★★☆☆☆ 2010 L A Zombie Bruce LaBruce
★★★☆☆☆ 2013 Elysium Neill Blomkamp
★★★★★☆ 2013 I’m So Excited Pedro Almodovar
★★☆☆☆☆ 2007 Superbad Greg Mottola
★★★★★☆ 1993 Blue Derek Jarman
★★★★☆☆ 2009 Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen Michael Bay
★★★☆☆☆ 1930 Menschen am Sonntag Kurt Siodmak, Robert Siodmak, Edgar G Ulmer, Fred Zinnemann & Rochus Gliese
★★★☆☆☆ 1996 Bottle Rocket Wes Anderson
★★★★★☆ 1937 Shall We Dance Mark Sandrich
★★★★★☆ 2000 In The Mood For Love Kar Wai Wong
★★★★★☆ 1988 Chocolat Claire Denis
★★★★★☆ 2010 Winter’s Bone Debra Granik
★★★★☆☆ 1963 Shock Corridor Samuel Fuller
★★★★★☆ 1945 Brief Encounter David Lean
★★★☆☆☆ 2011 Scream 4 Wes Craven
★★★★★★ 1979 Woyzeck Werner Herzog
★☆☆☆☆☆ 2013 Pacific Rim Guillermo del Toro
★★★★★★ 2007 Paranoid Park Gus van Sant
★★★★★★ 1983 L’Argent Robert Bresson
★★★★☆☆ 2007 Eastern Promises David Cronenberg
★★★☆☆☆ 2005 New York Doll Greg Whiteley
★★★☆☆☆ 1985 Subway Luc Besson
★★★★★☆ 1980 Berlin Alexanderplatz Rainer Werner Fassbinder
★★★☆☆☆ 2002 Solaris Steven Soderbergh
★★★★☆☆ 2002 The Rules of Attraction Roger Avary
★★★☆☆☆ 1971 Two-Lane Blacktop Monte Hellman
★★☆☆☆☆ 1934 Of Human Bondage John Cromwell
★★★★☆☆ 2013 The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug Peter Jackson
★★★★★★ 1965 Pierrot le fou Jean-Luc Godard
★★★☆☆☆ 2002 Resident Evil Paul W S Anderson
★★★★☆☆ 2005 The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy Garth Jennings
★★★★★☆ 1953 Tokyo Story Yasujirô Ozu
★★★☆☆☆ 2004 2046 Kar Wai Wong
★★★☆☆☆ 1999 Jawbreaker Darren Stein
★★★★★★ 2006 Inland Empire David Lynch
★★★★★☆ 1990 Cry-Baby John Waters
★☆☆☆☆☆ 1970 Husbands John Cassavetes
★★★★★☆ 2012 Hunger Games Gary Ross
★★★★★☆ 2010 Sound of Noise Ola Simonsson, Johannes Stjärne Nilsson
★★★☆☆☆ 1993 Three Colours: Blue Krzysztof Kieslowski
★★★★☆☆ 1930 Animal Crackers Victor Heerman
★★★★★☆ 2004 Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind Michel Gondry
★★☆☆☆☆ 2008 The Day The Earth Stood Still Scott Derrickson
★★★★☆☆ 2011 Midnight in Paris Woody Allen
★★★★★☆ 1981 Death in Venice Tony Palmer
★★★★☆☆ 1943 Destination Tokyo Delmer Daves
★★★★★☆ 1987 Out of Rosenheim Percy Adlon
★★★☆☆☆ 1977 The Serpent’s Egg Ingmar Bergman
★★★☆☆☆ 1995 The Flower of My Secret Pedro Almodóvar
★★★★☆☆ 1992 Simple Men Hal Hartley
★★★★☆☆ 1988 Heathers Michael Lehmann
★★★★★☆ 2013 G B F Darren Stein
★★★★☆☆ 1994 Prêt-à-Porter Robert Altman
★★★★☆☆ 2013 Gravity Alfonso Cuarón
★★★★★☆ 1935 Top Hat Mark Sandrich
★★★★★☆ 2009 White Material Claire Denis
★★☆☆☆☆ 2012 Promised Land Gus Van Sant
★★★★☆☆ 2008 Adoration Atom Egoyan
★★★☆☆☆ 2010 You Again Andy Fickman
★★★★★☆ 1960 Breathless Jean-Luc Godard
★★★☆☆☆ 2013 The Hunger Games: Catching Fire Francis Lawrence
★★★★☆☆ 2011 Limelight Billy Corben
★★★★★★ 1948 Bicycle Thieves Vittorio De Sica
★★★★☆☆ 1973 Day For Night François Truffaut
★★★★★☆ 1942 To Be Or Not To Be Ernst Lubitsch
★★☆☆☆☆ 2013 CBGB Randall Miller
★★★☆☆☆ 1936 Theodora Goes Wild Richard Boleslawski
★★★★☆☆ 1939 The Rules of the Game Jean Renoir
★★★☆☆☆ 2009 Inglorious Basterds Quentin Tarantino
★★★☆☆☆ 2005 A History of Violence David Cronenberg
★★★☆☆☆ 2010 Blue Valentine Derek Cianfrance
★★★★☆☆ 2006 Small Town Gay Bar Malcolm Ingram
★★★★☆☆ 1940 Foreign Correspondent Alfred Hitchcock
★★★★☆☆ 1948 The Red Shoes Michael Powell, Emeric Pressburger

I started CM&C partially because I had too many unseen DVDs on the shelves. After finishing it, I have more unseen movies than I started with.

cocks3

And I have way more booze in the cupboard than anybody should have.

I peeked at imdb scores for the films I was watching, and it seems like virtually all movies get a rating between 6.5 and 7.5.  The only exceptions are truly awful ones, that get 5.7-6.3, and totally horrible fan service ones that get a rating of 8.0-8.5.  Any newer movie with a rating over 7.5 is almost certainly execrable.

Hm…  perhaps I should do a correlation matrix between my ratings and imdb ratings…  but that seems like work.

And now I never have to watch another movie again in my life! Whoho! I have my life back!

5 thoughts on “CM&C Redux”

  1. The best dessert cocktail was Bailey’s Banana Split. But anything with mint in it is good, so I’ll say Mint Juleps .Hm. Or perhaps the Seatlle Manhattan. Er…

      1. =D

        oh, you should calculate the correlation between coctail ratings and movie ratings to see if bad movies influenced your opinion of the drink

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