The Internet Help Desk

 About once a month, I get really drunk and answer the Gmane email.  90% is “please remove my

message”, which I do.  If it’s from the person who asks to have it removed.

The other 10% are kinda … assorted.  I think this is of interest to you.  All of you.  So here I present a [redacted] extraction of those 10%s from tonight.  I don’t mean to be mean.  But c’mon.

Prepare to be puzzled.

—————

The below companies are using zeromq in the field of “financial
services”, “game devolpment”, “embedded systems”, ” academic research”,
“aeronatics”.

Microsoft
Zynga
Barclays

But we require the information about for what purpose these all above
companies ar using zeromq.[for example we are planing to use as a
message broker for sending messages between two clients] can you please
provide these informations as soon as possible. I need very early. I ll
be waiting for your reply.”

———–

Search title gets encoded as UTF-8/ISO-8859-1.  You want to wonder if
this is a bug.

———–

I’m building an AngelList profile, and need your help.  Can you do me
a favor and follow me by clicking here:

———–

I’m trying to get in touch with [redacted]. Do you have an email
address or his current contact information? Best Regards,
[redacted] Investigator

———–      

Ich war mir über die Veröffentlichung dieser Email nicht bewusst und
bitte Sie daher meine Personenbezogenen Daten aus dem Beitrag zu
löschen

———–

There’s a message with subject “Google”.  The body says “Cam on”.

———–

We have learned that unauthorized individual(s) secured a link
promoting our website [redacted].com on one or more of your web
properties.

———–

it got returned with this message.  my message is attached here for
you to  see. why was it returned?  i need for aall to know about
[redacted], and its pro capabilities,  and for those who use
[redacted], knocking it down,  saying its not production ready,are
mistaken.

———–

I got your contact in this post
http://permalink.gmane.org/gmane.comp.handhelds.phonegap/%5Bredacted%5D I wonder
if you could create a new wifi network, entering the ssid and password
in the app and creating the network automatically.

———–

I need your assistance if you can. I accidentally sent a message to
the [redacted] email list last night with a live password in
it. The password is hardcoded in to dozens of machines, so changing it
would be… inconvenient, to say the least. I don’t yet see the message
on your archive page, so I can’t provide the URL link, but I wanted to
see if you could remove the message before it is processed and posted.

———–

This week, due to your GNAME postings, I just suffered the loss of an
important job opportunity, and contract because an individual obtained
the private communications I had not intended for publication by
[redacted]. After the list error I wrote several people on that list
ridiculed me.

As I informed Mr. [redacted], there are treatises between the Nations of
the United States and yours, I believe, Norway, which mandate
compliance with the California State and Federal privacy laws
respectively.

I have sent him as I will probably have to send you a Cease and Desist
Notice, in lieu of a possible Federal Civil Suit for Injunctive Relief,
and damages. If any internet content states that a person in the United
States does not want his personal email posted on the internet, you
must abide by the meaning of the content.

———-

Though the organization [redacted] expressly prohibits the publication
of any archived communications, my personal and private communication
was published on the internet, via GMANE.

Though Mr. [redacted] alleges that he has no liability, the origin of
the privacy violation originated from his negligent management of his
list.  I have notified you of the ANTI SPAM ACT of the US Government
which can be enforced due to the treaties between the US Government and
Norway. You have failed to respond in kind.

The penalties that can be adjudged against you due to your reckless
and knowing violation of the aforementioned act, and my privacy rights
under the California Constitution, the highest law in the land for any
one person living in the State of California, are very high.

The posting cost me a $76K job opportunity.

2 thoughts on “The Internet Help Desk”

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